Co-Workers Suck!

So both of my jobs are sucking big-time for me right now.

My 'part-time' cash room job is full of fun tension because there is a belief that someone is stealing. I can't go into all the details right now because it is a long story, but it's basically an "us vs. them" mentality that is totally lacking any objectivity.

My main job, I just overheard two co-workers talking about me behind my back. But since I was in the room, and apparently I come across as mentally dull, they used euphemisms like "the last time this job was done" and generic pronouns like "they". Literally talking behind my back 5 feet behind me. The sad thing, is they were actually trying to be polite.

So now I'm crying because I'm having such a crappy work week. I just don't know when it will get better.

I want to confront people but I don't want to too.

Two weeks ago I loved both of my jobs. Now I just want to win the lottery and quit.

- Susan in Seattle

Seattle Debt Group

Several years ago (gosh, maybe seven!), I decided to start a debt support group. I put out a couple of ads and got about twelve people to meet at my house and talk about their money problems. Within three or four months, the “Seattle Debt Group” dwindled to three interested parties: Gordon, Christina and Susan (that would be me). After about four years of monthly meetings, I convinced my co-worker, Heather, to join.

We meet generally on the first Saturday of every month. We used to meet at my house, but now we just meet for breakfast somewhere. I’m totally dedicated to this meeting and really make an effort to attend. I’m happy to say that everyone in the group feels the same way. I don’t think I would be where I am today (financially and emotionally) if I did not have this relatively objective group in my life.

This all started because I realized I really had a credit card problem, but couldn’t seem to get it under control. I shopped, ate and partied at the same places as my friends, but I was charging SO MUCH. I didn’t understand it because I made more money than almost all of them. So then I started talking about it. Letting my friends know that I needed to curtail my spending. But I didn’t understand how THEY could afford it. I thought that maybe I was the stupid or undisciplined one. I made budgets and couldn’t keep them. I would buy spontaneously and emotionally. I floated checks.

Then little by little, my buddies started to admit that they all had major amounts of debt. That’s when I realized something: if the math doesn’t add up, it’s because I don’t have all the facts. So now, I just presume people my age have lots of credit card debt. I base this on the things they say, their behavior and frankly, what the own. I’m almost never wrong. I’m Generation X and apparently we all want it and we all want it now.

I now consider myself a “student of consumer debt”. I may seem obsessed to people, but I’m retiring a millionaire. That’s something I know.

Back to Debt Group. One of the coolest things about Debt Group is the dichotomy of it’s members. We have Christina & Gordon who are disciplined budgeters. They are both incredibly smart and politically minded. Luckily, if one says a slightly esoteric joke, the other one can laugh – or else they would face the blank stares of me and Heather.

Heather and I are still emotional spenders. Unlike Christina & Gordon who chose budgeting as a way to pay off debt, Heather and I chose working our asses off (although Gordon did work a 2nd job and paid off $5000 in 6 months). We both really struggled with paying off our debt. I’ve been going down steadily for years, Heather would go up and down and up and down*… She declared bankruptcy earlier this year. It was a good thing. She has three kids and she was feeling guilty about not being home for them. I do think it was a good thing that she struggled for so long before paying it off, or else she would be back in debt already. She told me that in bankruptcy court, out of the 80 or so people, only about 10 were there for a first bankruptcy.

More specifically for this month’s meeting, we had some great news and some bad news. Christina found a job (she has been out of work for several months). She had a pretty decent emergency fund before her contract ended and her husband has a good job, so her issue was emotional, even more than financial (that’s MY opinion, perhaps not hers). Gordon on the other hand, practically lost all sources of revenue in the last four weeks. He’s a self-employed Karaoke host and lost almost every contract. I really admire his entrepreneurship. It really takes dedication and tenacity to be self-employed. I also admire his choice to live a life of his choosing as opposed to working for “the man”. That really takes sacrifice and a certain degree of self-knowledge to go down a different path.

Right now, I have about $6100 in credit card debt. I plan on making my last payment in April 2006. That’s basically $1000/month. I’m not sure I can do it. But I will kick some major debt-butt trying.

If you live in the Greater Seattle Metro area and are interested in joining Debt Group, please let me know.

- Susan in Seattle

*I just want to point out here that Heather is really good at giving head, so this is natural for her.

Close, but no Cigar - Chapter 2

So Thursday night, I went to my favorite place to relax. Although I usually ask for Linda, I’m not too picky about who I get. After checking in, I took off all my clothes. I went to my favorite room and practically walked into a naked man. He was sitting so high up that my face practically landed into his incredibly bushy lap. And then a big, black guy with dreads worked me over from head-to-toe. His hands were so soft. Softer than what I’m used to. He did a lot of ass work; although I've noticed that the last few guys I've had did a lot of ass work. I finished off the evening watching an asian guy take a hot, steamy shower.

Unfortunately, this all took place at my favorite massage parlor. Even if I was interested in an orgy, I would probably be too scared to actually take part.

I get my massages at New Seattle Massage. They provide massage and that’s all. No facials, no manicures, no pedicures, no haircuts. Just massage. And if you live in Seattle, I believe that it’s the best value in the city.

I usually get an hour-long deep tissue ($65) and a steam ($5 with massage, $15 without). I’ve been getting massages for a little over 12 years. Some years, I’ve been more consistent than others. When I was out of work for instance, I probably didn’t get a massage for about 3 years. I’ve probably had about 80 massages. And I’m a whore about it, too. I’ve had about 70 different sets of hands on me.

And then I met Linda. She is my massage-soulmate. I’ve never told her that, but she’s the best massage practitioner I’ve ever had. She uses deep tissue and myofacial release (which is like a localized deep tissue). I swear, she can work wonders.

I highly recommend massage to everyone. I find that the more I take massages, the longer my body stays relaxed. I absolutely believe it’s the reason I have almost no cellulite, despite the fact that I’m overweight. It’s literally been kneaded out of my ass. If you’ve never had a massage, ask for a Swedish massage. After a couple of those, go to Shiatsu for about a year. Then enter the realm of Deep Tissue. Almost all massage practitioners mix the disciplines, but if you’ve never had a massage before, Deep Tissue will probably bruise you and Shiatsu would be too boring.

I’m totally masochistic. I go for Deep Tissue. And I'm hardcore about it too. I can take the pain. But I get off the table loosey-goosey. And it lasts for a few days. I really believe in the benefits of massage and I am always looking to convert people. Not that it's so hard to convince people to get a massage...

- Susan in Seattle